Sen Mendiola

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My online journal filled with random musings on motherhood, life and my creative journey as an artist.

Musings: 01

Hold me. Tight. Let me know you can see the struggles, through the cold stone wall.

Pull me. Out from the dark corner of my mind. Where fear, guilt and pain are playing like music in an endless loop.

Kiss me. Long and passionately. Like it’s the only thing you need to go through life.


The bridge is shaking. Cracks crawling slowly. Glue is warring out.

Questions are firing. Doubts are creeping. And I feel lost between reality and imagination.

Is it just in my head? Or my gut slapping me mercilessly.


Mind could see the end clearly. Heart taking steps closer each moment.

But those innocent eyes are calling, pleading. Holding my hands and feet. Begging my heart and mind.

Should I? Should we? I’m lost. You’re clueless.


Words. Promises. Expectations.

Crossroads. Of how and why. Of what if and what is. Of should and should not.

Decisions. Resentment. Hopeless. Tiring.

Let’s move on. And end the night fall.

 

// Written originally on 30th May 2019. Inside Cathay Pacific airbus flying from Jakarta to Hong Kong.